


Softly Playing Melodies

by Strange and Intoxicating -rsa- (strangeandintoxicating)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angsty fluff?, Just two boys in a car, M/M, nothing more than some UST, pre-kerberos, singing to bad pop that's a hundred years old
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-20
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2019-06-30 06:36:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15746286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strangeandintoxicating/pseuds/Strange%20and%20Intoxicating%20-rsa-
Summary: Shiro's always playing those cheesy romantic ballads about unrequited love, and Keith can only take so much more Air Supply.Pre-Kerberos confessions.





	Softly Playing Melodies

**Author's Note:**

> Just some sweet, soft pre-Sheith feels.

There’s an old song, a tune that never really dies out, playing through Shiro’s car. Of course, Shiro is singing to it because it’s _Shiro_ and this is the kind of thing that Shiro loves to do.

There’s a lot of things that Shiro loves to do, and each and every one of them fills a part of Keith that he isn’t sure has a name, but he knows he never wants to see fade.

It’s the part of Shiro that is always smiling, even when things are hard. It’s the part of Shiro that took Keith in, gave him a shot, even when he really shouldn’t have. It’s the part of Shiro that comes to knock on Keith’s door whenever Keith’s had a bad day, bringing him out for coffee or ice cream or racing or whatever will make the anger and hurt in Keith subside, even if it’s only for a short while.

And these songs…

Today, of all days…

“ _Hands, touchin’ hands, reachin’ out, touching me, touchin’ yooooou_ —c’mon, Keith. At least smile a little.”

“This song is like a hundred years old. Why are we listening to it?” Keith knows precisely why they’re listening to it; Shiro is a disaster gay whose musical taste died before he was even born. He finds a special kind of refuge in the soft crescendo and guitars.

Keith can appreciate that, just a little. But today…

This is the last time they’ll get to do this before Shiro leaves, before Keith’s all on his own again. That thought rips a hole deep inside Keith, and he can barely remember to breathe.

“It’s a classic, Keith. _Really_.” There’s something beautiful in the way he smiles at that, like Shiro is telling him a secret, something that is only for Keith.

When Keith hits the next button, it changes nothing because Shiro is, and has always been, a massive sap.

“ _You make me feel like I’m livin’ a teenage dream—_ ”

That’s not doing much better for Keith, who is trying his best to ignore the stirring in his gut, because god, Shiro looks ridiculous and gorgeous all at the same time, and it’s making everything just that much _worse_.

Why was he even thinking about telling Shiro in the first place?

“Is this your sappy and romantic playlist?” Keith snarks, because snarking really is the only thing he can do right now.

“Fine, how about this—” Shiro fiddles with his phone and all of a sudden there’s a song that Keith definitely doesn’t want to be listening to.

“ _I’m all out of love, and so lost without you—”_

“Not funny, Shiro.”

Shiro laughs, and it’s like the sun and the moon, and Keith feels light just at the scene. It’s been weeks since Shiro’s smiled, genuinely _smiled_ , and it’s good that Keith will have these memories to stay with him.

Ever since Shiro and Adam had broken up, Shiro had been stormy, sad, and a little less like himself than before. Keith knew that Shiro loved Adam, that a little piece of him would no doubt always love Adam, but Shiro needed something else. He needed someone who would be willing to stay by his side, no matter how difficult things got.

But this wasn’t the time to think about that. It wouldn’t be fair to throw out big words and love declarations right before Shiro left—

“You’re not complaining, so I’m gunna take it that you like Air Supply?”

“You wish,” Keith bites back, but there’s a dullness to his words that almost hurts, and Keith knows Shiro knows, and Shiro knows that Keith knows he knows, and on and on again the circle goes.

“Wanna talk about it?” Shiro says, and really, Keith both does and doesn’t, because talking about it means admitting things he’d much rather have hidden in the secret place where he hides his heart.

“I’m fine—”

“No secrets.”

That’s always been their promise to one another; no secrets, no lies, no regrets.

The next song begins, and Keith shakes his head.

“You gunna say goodbye to Adam? Is he gunna come tomorrow?”

Shiro glances his way for a moment before tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. “I… don’t know,” Shiro admits. There’s a frown pulling his lips down, and Keith can’t help but stare, just for a second, before turning away to stare out his window. “There’s a lot of… things. It’s complicated.”

Shiro hums the next song, mouthing the lyrics. He’s not smiling so much, now. “ _Now they’re going to bed and my stomach is sick—_ ”

“But you want to, right?” Keith knows this feeling better than he would ever dare admit, and he tries his best to push it down, push it as far away as he possibly can. Shiro doesn’t deserve his anger or his _jealousy_.

Shiro sighs. “I don’t know. We were… we were good for each other for a long time. But, well…”

Shiro pauses, and Keith’s pretty sure that his heart stops beating at that exact moment.

“Well, what?” Keith shouldn’t be pushing, but he needed to hear this. He needed to understand Shiro, even if it hurt him.

“One day you’ll understand.”

“Don’t pull that patronizing shit with me, Shiro,” Keith begins, but Shiro shakes his head as he pulls the car into a small parking lot.

“Not patronizing you,” Shiro says, and Keith can almost hear the weariness in his voice. “I’m not saying that you’re too young to understand.”

The stone that had dropped in the pit of Keith’s stomach earlier at the mention of Adam eased. “W—”

“All I mean is that one day when you have a relationship like the one I had with Adam, that you’ll understand. Sometimes… sometimes love just isn’t enough. Wanting something is not enough to make something work, and…” Shiro pauses as he looks over his shoulder as he pulls the car into its parking space.

When the car comes to a stand-still and Shiro turns the off, he finally turns to look at Keith. The music is still playing, and Keith isn’t sure if he wants it turned off yet.

“And what?”

Shiro gives a half-shrug, and despite the fact that he’s smiling, there’s something just ever so _off_ about it. “Sometimes relationships aren’t meant to last, Keith.”

“You deserve someone who loves you completely for who you are. Not someone who’ll leave when things get hard—”

But Shiro shakes his head, sending a little twirl of hair down his forehead. Keith wishes he could reach out and brush it back, but that isn’t what friends do.

That’s what lovers do.

“It’s more complicated than that. Love **_is_** hard. You’ll understand one day, I’m sure of it. You’ll find some lovely girl and—”

“I don’t want a girl. I want—”

_You. I would give you my entire world if you just **asked**._

“Forget I said anything,” Keith begins, but Shiro reaches out with his right hand to pat Keith on the shoulder.

“It’s okay, Keith. If, you know…” Shiro gives a smile. “It doesn’t matter if it’s a girl or boy. Just as long as they love you, and you love them back.”

“That’s not what I—Shiro, just—”

But he looks at Keith with such an earnest expression that it’s hard for Keith to keep looking at him. It’s as if just by looking that he’ll mess it all up and Shiro’ll never look at him the way he really wants him to. How does a person tell the one they love that they love them?

“I understand, Keith—”

“You’re so—frustrating,” Keith finally bites out, and it almost physically aches to see the flash of confusion and hurt cross Shiro’s face. “Just let me spit this out, it’s hard enough when you’re looking at me like—like—”

“Like what?”

“Like that!” Keith yells, and Shiro seems to have stopped breathing. “Just let me—let me tell you I love you before you fly off tomorrow!”

Keith’s breathing heavy, far too heavy to hear the whisper of the words from one of Shiro’s old pop songs. All he can focus on is the way his words hang in the air, and Keith wants to take them back, but he also _doesn’t_.

“Ke—Keith?” Shiro stutters and turns back in his chair, leaning back. “Oh.”

“That’s all you have to say?” Keith wants to cry, because here he is, sitting in Shiro’s car on the eve of him leaving for a three-year mission, listening to bad pop music as he bares and breaks his heart for Shiro, and all Shiro can say is, “Oh.”

But he can’t be angry at Shiro, because Shiro is _Shiro_ , for all of his flaws and obliviousness.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled.” Keith swallows back an angry jab because Shiro is frowning deeper, now. “I’m just—I wanted to let you know. Before you left. I wanted you to know that I’ll be here when you get back. Please don’t—”

Keith can barely say the next words because even thinking them causes his heart to seize up in his chest.

“Please don’t hate me.”

It’s those words that snap Shiro from his stupor, and he reaches out with his right hand, his medical device close enough to Keith’s ear that he can hear the faint zapping coming from inside. “I don’t hate you, Keith. I could never hate you.”

It’s awkward and uncomfortable, and Air Supply is playing again, and Keith doesn’t even have the energy to open the door to kill the music. Instead, he’s found the mostly-empty parking lot and the ever-looming spaceship on the horizon has become the only thing he can look at right now. He can’t see Shiro’s face. He just… _can’t_.

“I—I didn’t know,” Shiro admits, and Keith is almost happy to hear that. Keith didn’t want their relationship to change, didn’t want Shiro or Adam to find out about it. Hell, if Shiro weren’t leaving tomorrow, then Keith would have waited a few more years—

But by then… there wouldn’t be any time. Shiro’s on borrowed time as it is, but—

“Keith, when I get back…”

“I’ll wait for you.”

“Please,” Shiro whispers, “please don’t do that. I’m an old man—”

“You’re twenty-four!”

“I’m _dying_ , Keith. Slowly, sure, but I’m dying. When I get back… I don’t know how long I’ll be alive after that. I’ve got maybe another five years, maybe six.” This is something that Shiro’s obviously been thinking about, considering his life the same way others look at the expiration date on the back of a milk carton. “You don’t want to waste your youth on me, and then when I get back, what? Watch me die, slow and in pain?”

But Keith knows what he wants to say even before it comes out of his mouth. He’s known it for years.”

“ _I’d fall a thousand miles if I could just hold you for one night_.” Keith turns to Shiro, and he can see that there are tears in Shiro’s eyes.

“Those aren’t the right lyrics,” Shiro manages to laugh out, but there’s something wet to his words, and Keith reaches up for Shiro’s hand that’s curled on his shoulder.

It isn’t more than that—just a gentle touch, something for Shiro to have on those cold, lonely nights in space. But at least Shiro knows, and at least, in this moment, Keith feels _free_.

“I’m not asking you to… like, love me. Or feel guilty—” Shiro gives him a look he’s never seen before, but Keith continues, “—but, I dunno. If—”

_If something happens to you up there, I want you to know I love you._

“No secrets.”

“You’re gunna have a lot of time to think about—think about Earth when you’re out there in space. And I want you to be thinking of me.”

It feels foolish, juvenile in a thousand different ways, but the way Shiro smiles makes it feel a little bit less so.

They don’t kiss, they don’t touch any more than the hand on Keith’s shoulder and his open palm against Shiro’s knuckles, but it’s enough. Anything is enough for now, because while it isn't a yes, it isn't a no, either.

There’s an old song, a strong beat compared to the other songs on Shiro’s playlist, and Keith can only smile when he hears the words Shiro’s mumbling. “ _We found love in a hopeless place._ ”

“Huh. I guess... maybe we did.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> First person who guesses all the songs in the comments gets a cookie and a mini-fic.


End file.
